New Video: The Best Way to Stop Controlling Everything

BEST WAY TO STOP CONTROLLING EVERYTHING (LIFE IS WORKING FOR YOU)// If you’re wondering how to stop controlling everything and how to quit overthinking, watch this video. It will give you tips on how to trust yourself and on letting go of needing to control. Do you ever ask yourself, “How can I stop overthinking?” You’ll learn how not to stress and finally find out the answer to the question “How do I trust myself?” with these useful self care strategies.

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Thanks for being here and watching the video! If you prefer to read the transcript, you'll find it below:

Do you find that you're constantly overthinking things and trying to control everything in your life? Hi, I'm Christina Marlett, the creator of Courageous Self-Care and today I'm going to show you how to release that control and learn how life is working for you.

For the best advice on how to practice strategic self-care that goes beyond bubble baths, chocolate, and wine, be sure to subscribe to the channel and hit the bell to be notified when a new video is released each Thursday. If you know that you have a tendency on overthinking things and trying to control different parts of your life, by the end of this video, you'll learn how to not stress so much about what other people are thinking about you and how you can trust in yourself. I've used this process with so many of my private clients and with my group coaching clients, with tremendous success. Now it's your turn. Be sure to stick around until the end of the video. I've created a really amazing resource for you that's going to show you how to stop feeling so drained.

Okay step number one is to notice what you are controlling. I used to be someone who thought all the time about everything and tried to control every part of my life. I had a t-shirt that said, "Think," and it had a big brain neuron on it, and I remember my dad saying to me once, "You're always thinking aren't you?" And I thought, "Yes, I am," and I was so proud of myself. Then when I started doing personal development, I learned that thinking is not so good for you if you're overthinking and ruminating, and playing negative situations over and over, which I had a tendency to do. Then I got a t-shirt that said, "Don't think. Don't think. Don't think. Don't think. Don't think." Then I got rid of those t-shirts, and decided to trust myself.

I also tried to control everything. I tried to control my emotions. I only wanted to share the sunny happy ones. I tried to control what other people were thinking about me. I tried to control situations and I spent so much energy trying to have all this control, when really, truthfully, we don't have all that much control, especially about what other people think of us. When I dug a little bit deeper, I realized that I had a fear of people thinking that I wasn't professional or that I didn't know what I was doing. This was as a brand new teacher, over a decade ago. I wanted people to see me as their equal, and so I had this pristine image that I wanted to maintain. I didn't end up being very vulnerable. I wasn't authentic. I hid a lot. That goes a lot with controlling. Step number one is you want to figure out what it is that you're controlling.

Step number two, controlling and overthinking embodiment exercise. Now since I am an embodiment coach, I like to get my clients to experience things, not just with their minds, but also with their bodies and their emotions and their spirit. That is the art of embodiment, and so I'm going to invite you to participate in this embodiment exercise as well. It's mindful movement, and there are two different things you need to think about while you do it. I certainly encourage you to participate. Number one is to notice how your body is showing up in this exercise, and number two is to notice what thoughts are coming up for you. Not to try to stop them, but just to notice, because they're going to give you some great information. Now this is probably going to expand your comfort zone, so I invite you to play along. Don't overthink it, just do it and enjoy. Please stand up.

Okay here we are standing up. Not overthinking, letting go of the judgment and the control. Put your feet just under your hips, under your shoulders, and you're going to start to move your hips side to side. Now go a little faster, and a little bit faster. As fast as you can go. Okay and now being curious about all the different ways you can move your pelvis, shake it around. Okay and stop. Take a deep breath. In through your nose and out through your mouth, and have a seat.

Now my first question is, did you actually get up and do the exercise or did you just watch me do it? That's saying something about how you're living your life. The way you do anything is the way you do everything, so if you jumped in and participated, super secret bonus points for you. Way to go. If you didn't do it, just ask yourself why. Become curious about that. Now if you did do it, your body likely gave you some interesting information. It might of been difficult to get yourself to move. You might of noticed all sorts of different things, but also noticing your thoughts. When we are expanding our comfort zones, often our thoughts are the ones that show up that limit us on a regular basis. I invite you to share what you noticed in this embodiment exercise in the comments below, and don't be shy. One of the first things to do when you were learning to release control is to be vulnerable, share what's going on for you, so please do that in the comments now.

Step number three, release control in one area. We just played with releasing control in one physical area. If you're anything like me and most of the people I work with, well probably 100% when we start to move our pelvis, we realized that we can't take life seriously. There's just something funny about wiggling our hips and our booties around. That is an indication of the joy and freedom that lies behind releasing that control. I invite you over the next week to choose one area where you can release control. Maybe it's your emotions. Maybe it's wearing something that actually represents who you are. Maybe it's letting go of how the towels hang on the racks in your house. Wherever you feel like you're being limited by controlling and overthinking, play with that one area. Become curious of how you can not stress so much, not over think it, and being lighter and more playful.

Now you know three easy steps to help you let go of control. I also mentioned that I had a free resource for you, so holding on to control and overthinking things, as I mentioned before, is one way that a lot of people tend to drain their energy leaving them exhausted. There are nine other ways that I've identified that we can drain our energy without really being aware of it, and so I created a free resource for you. It's called The Top 10 Energy Drains Mini Course. First of all, you'll find out what those top 10 energy drains are that are secretly draining away energy without being aware of it, and then I give you solutions, very strategic solutions so that you can flog up those drains and start having more energy than you've ever had before. It really works incredibly well. You can get access to this mini course using the link in the description below.

Also, I would love to invite you to join the Courageous Self-Care Facebook community. It's a private group filled with like minded women who are on this journey to practice self-care beyond bubble baths, chocolate, and wine without the guilt and with courage. Please do join us there. I would love to see you. If you like this video, please give it a like, leave a comment, and share it with your friends. Be sure to tune in next week when I will be sharing the biggest mistake people tend to make when they're trying to live their life on purpose. Thank you so much for watching today. I'm Christina Marlett, creator of Courageous Self-Care, and your self-care coach. I look forward to connecting with you again next time. Bye bye for now.

Oh hang on a second. Did you see last week's video? It was this really amazing forgiveness practice I use, called Ho'oponopono. It's a Hawaiian healing practice. If you missed it, you can watch it by clicking the link on the screen now. Okay, I'm really going now. Bye bye.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfZzc_AbNXM&feature=youtu.be